Hercules is 'The Responsible One'

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Hercules is often "The Responsible One" when Jason and/or Iolaus are goofing off. He tries to stay responsible, but often the taunting of his friends is enough to tempt him to goof off as well - often with consequences.

1.03 - What a Crockery

      Hercules is on a mission to deliver Zeus's Chalice to Zeus's temple, but Iolaus and Jason talk him into a game of Melonball that distracts them long enough for Strife to steal the chalice.

Iolaus: Guys, you know what I'm thinking?

Iolaus and Jason: MELONBALL! Yeah!
Hercules: No, no, no no! We've got to get the chalice to the temple, all right?
Iolaus: What, you can't handle us?
Jason: I thought you were Mighty Hercules, Conqueror of the Gods!

Hercules: Okay, all right. I guess if we get the chalice to Zeus's temple this week, I'll have time to teach you two a lesson.

1.06 - Teacher's Pests

      Jason starts looking at the private student records, and Hercules tried to stop him before giving in.

Jason: So, I just dropped most of the 'F's.

Hercules: Okay?
Jason: Flanicci...
Hercules: Wait.
Jason: Flaenus...
Hercules: Oh. Jason - listen, I wouldn't mess with this if I was you, okay?
Jason: Ahh! Here we go! Pythias Fiducius! As in, 'Back when my boy, Pythias, went to school...'? Let's see if he's the hotshot Big Daddy says he is.
Hercules: Jason... I really think that we should put it back, okay?
Jason: Whoa.

Hercules: What? (takes the scroll and reads)

1.10 - Cyrano de Hercules

      When Hephaestus decides he wants to build a woman, Hercules immediately vetoes the idea. Later, he tries to redirect Galatea's affections towards Hephaestus instead of betraying his friend and taking her for himself.


Hercules: Hephaestus, making a woman sounds like an incredibly bad idea.

Hephaestus: But I can do it!

Hercules: It's not a question of 'Can do it', it's a question of 'Should do it'. And trust me, you shouldn't do it. It's wrong.
Hephaestus: I'll call her 'Galatea'.
Hercules: No, no, no, no, no, no, no! Hephaestus, tell me you didn't.

1.13 - Forgery

      The guys try to talk Hercules into going to Corinth for some fun, but he stands by his word that he promised to help Hephaestus. A few minutes later, Iolaus and Jason decide to play a trick by tying the wheels of a chariot to a stationary object, intending to "take that guy's wheels right out from under him". Hercules refuses to participate, "You pick the time. You pick your battles." After Iolaus recovers from being accidentally dragged off by the chariot, they continue to argue, Iolaus and Jason encouraging the fun and fancy-free lifestyle while Hercules is the voice of reason.


Jason: Even Hercules is gonna let his hair down.

Hercules: I am not letting my hair down. I already told you. I'm gonna help Hephaestus.
Jason: Hephaestus is a god. He can take care of himself.

Hercules: He's my half-brother, and I promised him I'd lend him a hand, okay?
Iolaus: Herc... you didn't tie the rope to anything.
Hercules: No, and I'm not gonna.
Iolaus: You know, if you'd tied the rope to a tree like I told you, this wouldn't have happened.

Hercules: If I had, it'd have ruined some guy's chariot, just 'cause you didn't like the way he talked to you.
Iolaus: It was a joke, Herc. A trick? Ah, man, where's your sense of humor?
Hercules: Well, you just can't go around doing everything you want, just 'cause it's fun.
Iolaus: It's an approach to life. You should try it sometime.
Hercules: Why don't you try being responsible?

Jason: Why don't you lighten up?

1.19 - The Lure of the Lyre

      Hercules is invited by Orpheus to party at Bacchus's Cavern. He turns down the offer, resisting Orpheus's lures until Orpheus name-drops Zeus. Hercules is drawn to the party, but his obligation to his responsibilities is enough to tear him away from the snare. Unfortuantly the enticement is too much to resist and Herc later appears to play hookey from school to re-visit the party with Iolaus and Lilith. The party turns out to be a cult recruitment, and Lilith is bitten by one of the Bacchae and almost turns into one herself.

Orpheus: Oh, you have to meet him. Bacchus is the god of good times. With Bacchus on your side, you can kiss your cares goodbye. Come on. I'll take you to him.

Hercules: Oh, I don't know. I kinda gotta get back to the academy, you know? School, so...
Orpheus: Come on, you can go to the academy any time.
Hercules: Uh, I'll see ya later, okay?
Orpheus: How often do ya get to meet one of the sons of Zeus?

Hercules: Bacchus is the son of Zeus?
Eurydice: Bacchus believes that pleasure and freedom are what all creatures should live for. No rules. No fears. No regrets. Your academy is all training and studying - no fun. Be one of us, Hercules. Forever.

Hercules: Uh, I should get going. Yeah, uh, it's getting kinda late.
Eurydice: Don't go. Join us, Hercules. Be part of our family. I want you to.

Hercules: Thank you very much for showing me around. I've never seen anything like it.

Young Hercules: Cheiron's Warriors

      Hercules, Iolaus, and Jason are walking from the Academy to the docks to meet with Cheiron, who is returning from a trip. On the way, Iolaus and Jason start play-fighting with sticks, but Hercules refuses to participate. The delay still causes the cadets to arrive late to the docks, where they find out that Cheiron has been kidnapped - a crime that they could have stopped had they arrived on time.

      Under other circumstances, Hercules might have joined the fun. "Come on, guys," he said. "We're going to be late meeting Cheiron. Quit horsing around."
      Right now it didn't look as if anything would break Iolaus and Jason apart. They were rolling around like wheels on a wagon, neither one gaining the upper hand for more than half a second.
      "Guys, come on, we're going to be late! And if we're late, Cheiron's going to give us That Look."